This was the final court appearance. August 2013 I withdrew with permission from the Judge from the court process to try to get contact with my little girl. I have done this with a heavy heart but I had two options. The Judge and Cafcass were 100% behind me whichever way I chose to go. Two paths, two options to have to decide which was the right one for my children and my beautiful family.
The first option was to go down the psychological testing of all concerned with this case including Mother and all the children. This by the Judge’s admission would take a further 2 to 3 years in court and probably a guaranteed change of residence due to the abuse the mother has inflicted upon the children and the personality problems she has. At what cost? How much further damage would this do to the children? How much more damage would it do to my family? In the end it may push my daughter further from me and we may never repair our once strong, positive and close bond as Father and Daughter. I started this court case because my daughter spoke to me on MSN and she wanted to see me and went against her Mother’s wishes but her Mother was never going to allow that to happen and used parental alienation to its extreme on her until she did what her Mother wanted. She now misses out on a beautiful family. I will continue to support and encourage my lads in having contact with their Mother and sister. Sadly my youngest son has not seen his mother or sister since the final contact session last August. My eldest son who is at Univeristy has only seen her when she has needed emotional support just two or three times, despite living quite close to where he goes to University. I have the support of the maternal grandparents and will continue to encourage the lads to spend quality time with them, as I have always done and this they continue to do.
The second option was to withdraw with the permission of the Judge and she may one day come looking for me, the loving, positive Dad who loved her from the moment she was placed in my arms and will remain deep in my heart until the day I die. For the good of my daughter, my sons and my family I chose this option with a very heavy broken heart. I know it is the right thing to do and the Judge and Cafcass praised me and read out a paragraph written in the final order. It made me cry but also gave me the sense I had done all I could.
The courts couldn’t guarantee they could force her to comply with any order made and so this long battle is over for now. I hope one day my little girl will come looking for her dad like the Judge and Cafcass feel she most certainly will and she will find a loving Father she has been ripped from and we can build our relationship from that day forward. The Judge and Cafcass said some pretty nasty but truthful things to my ex-wife, but for her she will not have heard any of them, she will have re-written this all in her favour and that is what she will always do. She will see it as she won, like she told my eldest she would, well nobody wins and everyone loses especially the children.
The evil of parental alienation and implacable hostility can never be dealt with by the courts under this current system. There needs to be serious change to prevent further abuse of #PAS by parents. I needed some time to come to terms with this and now I fight to bring awareness to the world about #PAS and I hope to be able to help all Fathers who do or do not have an implacable hostile mother of their children. All Fathers have hope of a positive outcome and should never be deterred from applying to the courts to gain access to their children.